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Any advice I receive that really resonates boils down to variations on the same basic theme: life is short. Stop wasting it.

It comes packaged in different poetic forms, each profound or corny, depending on one’s receptive or cynical sense. “Don’t take trouble” is my favorite, a distillation of “trouble is enough” from the Gospels. The poet Andrew Marvell said of his mistress: “The grave is a fine and private place, / But I think no one will embrace there.” Mary Oliver’s line “Tell me, What are you going to do with your wild and precious life?” A million memes have emerged. The message is consistent and irrefutable: a symbol of death. Remember you will die. Or, if you prefer, YOLO.

I found all of these exhortations urgent and moving, but also difficult to accept. So I’m always grateful to hear this again as a reminder to be mindful of how I’m spending or wasting my time.I recently heard a reminder like this A conversation between The Times’s David Marchese and actress Anne Hathaway. David asked her about turning 40 and entering middle age. She said she was hesitant to label this period of her life as in-between because she might get hit by a car later today. “We don’t know if this is middle age,” she said. “We don’t know anything.”

Having a landmark birthday coming up myself, I try not to think of it as some sort of deadline or reckoning, and I welcome Hathaway’s perspective on how we view time. It’s easy to default to picturing our lives as a timeline, charting our progress along that line, and of course we know where the beginning, middle, and end are. Hathaway recalled the moment she woke up from the stress and realized, “You take your life for granted. You don’t know. Something could fall from the sky and that would be your lights out.” You Here, the sun is burning, borrowing trouble, and walking gently into that good night. Memento Mori. Something could fall from the sky at any moment. If we truly understood this, how would it be different today?

There are some great books that explore this in depth: Denial of Death by Ernest Becker, Four Thousand Weeks by Oliver Berkman, A Year Alive by Stephen Levine. I’ve read them more than once, trying every now and then to keep the flame alive.Sometimes it burns so brightly I find myself hurry Another way to waste time in my life. While revisiting Levine’s book recently, I found myself dissatisfied with the amount of time I spent reading it: What if I spent too much time thinking about how to spend my time? At that time, that was probably me.

As David said in the interview, we know we can’t take for granted how much time we have left, but “internalize that so that we can treat every day and every moment of our lives like it’s our last, It will be every day and every moment of our lives. “The most powerful change we can make in our lives can also be the hardest thing to actually do. ” It’s one thing to intellectually understand the finitude of life, but another to actually live out its finitude. Whatever it takes to truly get it, it’s worth it, whether it’s reading it over and over again The same book, or talking about it with a friend; whether it’s a meditation practice or a sticky note on your monitor, or just paying close attention to how you spend your time.

It’s easy to overlook inspiration that is easily commoditized. I’m skeptical of “seize the day” type wisdom, and I could imagine painting it in bold cursive on a boat board and selling it at a home improvement store. But maybe that’s the point: Reminders of death have broad appeal because their impact is relevant to almost everyone. We don’t need to wait until we see something fall from the sky and come towards us to live as if it is possible. As Levine writes in A Year Alive, “Once you understand what your heart really wants, the work is the same whether you live or die.”

  • David Marchese’s conversation with Anne Hathaway is part of The Times’s new series “Interviews,” released weekly as podcasts and articles.you can Get the podcast hereor Read the interview here.

  • “Thinking about death is like a cold plunge into the soul, a tingle in the amygdala. You are renewed and your vision becomes clear.” On the occasion of “50th Anniversary”deny death“.

  • Meet the nun who wants you remember you will die.

  • Suspended death can be avoided indefinitely Hot yoga, gluten-free diets or antioxidants, or just refusing to watch are cowardly denials. ” From 2013, Tim Kreider tells the story of watching his parents age.


  • Donald Trump’s lawyers are trying to find inconsistencies in the testimony of former National Enquirer publisher David Pecker, Trump criminal trial in Manhattan. Peck defiantly responded that he was “honest to the best of my knowledge.”

  • Biden administration delays decision On whether to ban menthol cigarettes. Tobacco companies and some Black supporters of President Joe Biden oppose the ban.

  • Biden said in an interview with Howard Stern that he Would ‘be happy’ to debate Trump And criticized the Supreme Court as “perhaps the most conservative in modern history.”

  • The Times’s Charles Homans attended seven Trump rallies and commented on How different the former president sounds Compare that to his 2016 campaign.

Other big stories

  • US says it won’t suspend aid Israeli military accused of human rights violations In the West Bank, as long as Israel holds them accountable.

  • Columbia University Banned from campus A student leader of the pro-Palestinian protests said in the video that “Zionists do not deserve to live.” The student apologized.

  • The Fed’s preferred inflation measure Still stubbornly staying on top last month. That could prompt Fed officials to keep interest rates high for longer.

  • King Charles III will Resumption of public duties next weekIt’s an encouraging sign of recovery about three months after he revealed he had cancer.

  • Congestion pricing, which charges drivers higher fees to enter certain areas of New York City to ease traffic congestion, Will take effect on June 30. This is the first program of its kind in the country.

📺 Hackers (Thursday): Can’t you just make a joke? The HBO comedy returns for a third season, starring Jean Smart as a traditional comedian and Hannah Einbinder as an awkward millennial upstart. The show has plenty of laughs, many of which come from the stellar supporting cast, which includes Megan Stalter and Poppy Liu. But the best thing about “Hackers” is the celebrity and the high cost of comedy.

🎥 Scapegoat (Friday): America’s boyfriend Ryan Gosling stars opposite Emily Blunt in this remake of the 1980s TV series. Stuntman? Exactly. In this dazzling ode to movies and their filmmakers, Gosling stars as Colt Silvers, an injured stuntman hired to fill in for his irascible ex Jody (Blunt). directed movies. David Leitch, an experienced stuntman, serves as director.

Gluten-free pizza options may abound these days, but nothing beats the crackle of matzo crust, especially during Passover.in her matzo pizza, Melissa Clark does a great job of baking her own matzah bread with olive oil to keep it crispy. (Use a thicker pizza sauce, e.g. this, also helps. ) is great on its own or with more toppings.

hunt: A mother and daughter wanted a home with plenty of privacy outside of Atlanta. Which one did they choose? play our games.

What you get for $700,000: A 1926 brick house in Lexington, Kentucky; a two-bedroom apartment in Lyme, New Hampshire; or Tudor Revival Style Homes in Minneapolis.

Standard core: members of the Times Style Department Passionate about fashion In the tennis-slash-love-triangle movie “Contenders.”

Easy listening: Podcasts like “The Happiness Lab,” hosted by scholar Dr. Laurie Santos, Can help relieve anxious mood.

London: In a few years, you can have dinner at home, watch a fashion show, and take a walk in the garden. Tunnels beneath the city.

As a parent of young children, all I want for Mother’s Day is a few hours No them. Instead, my sister, a parent of teenagers, longed for any bit of time with her kids, and the phone hung up. Our consensus: save your flowers and skip the gift certificates. If you can make time on May 12th, either apart or together, do so!But as Wirecutter’s gifts editor, I have a front-row seat Dozens of Cheap Gifts I’ll gladly accept it. Combining pleasure, beauty and utility, each selection is perfect as a joyful reminder of your appreciation. (All this for less than $50!) Our advice is to do both: save your money and take your time. This is what moms really want. — Hannah Morrill

Boston Bruins vs. Toronto Maple Leafs, NHL Playoffs: One of hockey’s oldest rivalries is back for another game. How old are you? The two teams first met a century ago in 1924. Toronto hasn’t beaten Boston in a playoff series since 1959 and currently trails by two games to one. But don’t count the Maple Leafs out: They still have their best player on the floor in Auston Matthews, who leads the NHL in goals this season, One of the favorites to win MVP Airs on TBS at 8pm ET

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